


To Fly With Amber Wings

by This_world_of_beautiful_monsters



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (IDW Comics), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (TV 2012), Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: 1 Sentence Fiction, 50 Sentences, Actually 51 sentences because screw you, Angst, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Discussions of abuse, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Limb loss, Oral Sex, T-Cest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:35:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28828998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/This_world_of_beautiful_monsters/pseuds/This_world_of_beautiful_monsters
Summary: 50 Sentences, from various universes. I've seen one of these for Leo ("It Always Comes Back to You") and one of these for Raph ("Don't Let Me Push You Away") from zangetsugirl and one of these for Donnie ("Behind the Computer Screen") by Mendeia, but none of Mikey, so I decided to do one."Glimpse" is vaguely inspired by Netflix's "Pretend It's a City" by Fran Lebowitz.
Relationships: Casey Jones/Raphael (TMNT), Donatello/Michelangelo (TMNT), Leatherhead/Michelangelo (TMNT), Leonardo/Michelangelo (TMNT), Michelangelo/Mondo Gecko (TMNT), Michelangelo/Raphael (TMNT), Michelangelo/Renet Tilley, Michelangelo/Slash, Woody Dirkins/Michelangelo
Kudos: 17





	To Fly With Amber Wings

**1\. Different**

The vampires and werewolves on TV complain of being monstrous, but they can hide their monstrosity, turn themselves into the most beautiful examples of life instead of the ugliest, and sometimes Mikey thinks they really don't have much to whine about.

**2\. Blue**

When he was little (and sometimes when he's older) Mikey would stare into the mirror and try to will his eyes into a darker shade so he'd look more mature, more composed, more like _Leo._

**3\. Joy**

Mikey's head arcs back as Woody's bobs between his legs and he forgets everything, forgets his brothers and the Mutanimals, forgets Shredder's bloody corpse and his father's cold eyes, even forgets Woody's grandmother watching game shows downstairs, and lets himself just _be._

**4\. Glimpse**

Mikey peered boldly up through the sewer grate at the dark-haired woman with glasses peering back, only for her to shrug and keep walking; it took years for him to realize she could have been a threat, but she never betrays their secret.

**5\. Fight**

Mondo won't speak to him for a week, but Mikey refuses to tell him where he buried the "score" because his father has told him all about guns, and he'd never endanger his friend by letting him near one.

**6\. Lose**

Mikey doesn't know whether it's worse to have no memories of his mother beyond the astral plane, or to know her as well as his brothers did only to see her brutally ripped away.

**7\. Beautiful**

"Hold still," Shini chides, her brush skipping over Mikey's face like butterfly wings, and for once he actually does just that, a sight that would probably shock his brothers more than the makeup.

**8\. Questions**

The Triceratrons ask about his brothers' location, their weapons, their off-world capabilities, but Mikey doesn't let so much as a quip out because if he starts talking he'll never stop, so he just grits his teeth and recites the powers and secret origins of all his favorite superheroes in his head as electricity crackles across his skin.

**9\. Up**

Mikey soars across the skyline on the wings Donnie gave him, reaching out to see if he can touch the starts or at least caress the lights, knowing that there's always one friend or brother keeping watch on him from below.

**10\. Commiseration**

The experience of being blown and brought to life shouldn't be shared between family members, Mikey thinks, as he and Donnie curl in each other's arms, reminding each other whenever they wake up shaking that they're still here, still alive, and protected by someone they love.

**11\. Permanent**

He wields guns as often as nunchucks these days and the hand that brushes his cheek in the mirror is mechanical, but the freckles are still there, which Mikey supposes is just as freaky as him having them in the first place.

**12\. Garden**

It's Casey, of all people, who plays music to distract Mikey while operating the homemade tattoo gun; over time he'll plant a red poppy on one ankle, a bluebell on the other, a golden dahlia in one elbow, a violet in the other, a marigold on one shoulder, and on and on (a pink peony for Kitty, a black iris for Shini, a white rose for Tang Shen, a chrysanthemum for Sensei, a silver lily for Karai, a red petunia for Slash, a black-and-white tulip for Casey, a rainbow orchid for Leatherhead, a black-backed Bells of Ireland for Mondo, space flowers for Mona and the Professor....) until a flower for every person Mikey's ever loved is tucked carefully away on his body.

**13\. Discovery**

"RAPH'S DOING CASEY OHMIGOD RAPH'S DOING CASEY MY EYES I NEED BLEACH LEOOOOOO!"

**14\. Eat**

"It'll make you feel full," Leo promises, handing out bowls of boiled water and nothing else, and long after the hungry times have ended Mikey will watch his big brother making dinner and worry that there won't be enough noodles to go around.

**15\. Stupid**

Sometimes Mikey wonders if it's not him, but this life they live that requires him to think and care and worry about _everything_ in order to survive, even when he doesn't want to.

**16\. Rage**

Raph loses control sometimes, but for better or worse, no matter how many times he sits in the bathroom dabbing at bruises he'll say he got during training and sort of mean it, Mikey always manages to forgive him.

**17\. Church**

They slip in through the back, covered in hats and hoodies, and Mikey's stopped listening to the priest (sounds way too much like Leo) and flipped through most of the hardcore stuff in the Bible (Jeez, how'd they ever make a religion out of _this_?), but before he asks if they can leave he sees Mondo staring at a little old lady at the front of the church with a wistful expression on his face, so Mikey somehow manages to hold his tongue and isn't surprised when Mondo says, at the end, that "Abuela's lighting candles for me."

**18\. Control**

It makes Mikey sick to see Leo kneel at Shredder's feet like he's just a _thing_ to be ordered around; he feels the same when he sees his brother do the same for their father later, and that's when he gets really scared.

**19\. Music**

Mikey slips the headphones on and twirls around his room, Grandson and K.Flay and so many other voices ringing in his ear slits, trading the precise power of katas for a wilder, _safer_ dance.

**20\. Haunted**

He's seen Slash's shadow in too many alleyway, and it only get worst after Mutant Town, when there are so many big beautiful monsters walking around, but none of them are _his._

**21\. Growth**

"But I don't want Leo to feel left behind," Mikey murmured, as Donnie checked off his new height on one of the farmhouse's walls.

**22\. Protection**

"I won't let anyone else come near you," Mikey promises, and sits in the dark behind the huddled woman, doing her bandages and asking her about her life, until the sirens draw near.

**23\. Gift**

"If you keep her, I have to forget her," Renet says, and she's gone before Mikey can even mention how cruel that is, leaving him standing on a rooftop with a crying bundle and no idea what to tell his brothers.

**24\. Abuse**

Of all the families Mikey's seen on TV or glimpsed through windows, none of the parents have to enforce discipline with the violence Splinter uses, and he wonders if he and his brothers are doing something wrong until the day Donnie puts another, darker word on their situation.

**25\. Love**

It's so cold out, but the fridge isn't working and the malfunctioning heat is turning the Lair into a sweat lodge, so Mikey darts through the snowy night (avoiding the pissed-off brothers trying to drag him back to safety), clutching Ice Cream Kitty to his chest and murmuring sweet nothings to her through chattering teeth until Donnie calls to say it's fixed.

**26\. Freak**

"Did you really think I'd ever care about a creepy little fuck about you?" Bradford asks, and Mikey knows he shouldn't care what that asshole thinks, he _knows,_ but it still feels like another knife in his heart nonetheless.

**27\. Sing**

Leo doesn't know a thing about pitch and it's only gotten worse since his voice started to crack, but to Mikey his rendition of "Rockabye Baby" is the most beautiful thing in the world, because it sounds like home.

**28\. Speed**

When Mikey plucks an arrow out of the air, he thinks the shock on the Foot archer's face might mirror his own.

**29\. Restitution**

"You owe me for all the sick shit we let Splinter do to us so he'd never use his dick on the bitchy little _B-Team,"_ Raph hisses, shoving Mikey against the wall as alcohol breath pours from his mouth, and Mikey can't decide if he's right, can't make his body do anything when rough emerald hands crawl over his thighs until Leo show up and forces Raph away at sword point.

**30\. Poetry**

Mikey found some of Leo's haiku once, angry little reflections of his soul like beautiful and terrifying pieces of glass, and can't talk to him about it for fear that he'll stop.

**31\. Temptation**

They chase him as he runs, promise to care for him and look for him and pay attention to his needs as they never did before Parasitica "awakened" them, and the idea sounds so tempting he wants to cry.

**32\. Online**

As he exchanges banter and insults with fellow gamers, Mikey does a pretty good job of not thinking about how many of them would run away from him screaming in real life.

**33\. Warm**

He wishes he was still small enough to curl up under the sun lamp with the others in a tangle of soft green limbs and warm skin, although Mikey has to admit that he doesn't miss the occasional desperate struggles to find the _perfect_ hot spot.

**34\. Soft**

Casey gave him the Sexy Cat Costume as a joke, only to end up choking on his chips when Mikey emerged wearing the bra around his neck and the panties clipped to his belt (April frantically pounded Casey on the back, Donnie spat out his coffee, Raph tripped over his own feet, and Leo barely looked up from _Space Heroes_ long enough to say "You're not going out on patrol like that").

**35\. Kamikaze**

_Take me with you,_ he wants to say as Sally prepares for liftoff, because in some ways the idea of burning up with Slash seems kinder than living in a world without a part of his soul, a world where terrible things like this could happen to anyone he loves.

**36\. Nightmare**

He dreams of Tang Shen burning in that house, asking _why, why did I have to die for you to live,_ and he has no answer.

**37\. Seduce**

He's learning, by trial and error, to lure his brothers away from their various obsessions and insanities with his body, to let them use him into exhaustion, and when he wakes up screaming at night terror someone's always there to do the same for him.

**38\. Plunge**

Turtles can hear vibrations underwater, can find meaning in them like _love_ or _safety_ , but when the squirrel drags him down all Mikey can hear is an insane, meaningless babble, incomprehensible in any tongue.

**39\. Trick**

He _knew_ leprechauns weren't real, but he had to start up something to get that miserable look off Leo's face, and thankfully his brother gave him the perfect opening.

**40\. Guilt**

"I love you," Raph whispers, hugging him close, and Mikey knows he's telling the truth, which is what makes the next loss of control so painful for them both.

**41\. Reasons**

"Were you trying to get our attention?" Donnie asks after the Shellacne incident, not even in a mean way, and Mikey has no answer because, well...he's not that desperate for his family to look at him sometimes, _is_ he?

**42\. Cruel**

Mikey thinks one of the worst parts is the way they tossed him through the window in an attempt to lure them out, utilizing Leo's body as a weapon against his family, because he knows how much that would have tormented his big brother.

**43\. Faith**

Even after Leatherhead charges at him with eyes rendered blank from the brain worm, even after he knocks the chucks out of Mikey's hands, even after his throat works around Mikey's arm as he swallows it down, even though the aftermath sends them both spiraling into the dark....Mikey still loves him.

**44\. Victory**

His father falls at his feet, groaning, and Mikey stands there for what feels like an eternity, everybody waiting for him to counterattack with some cool new move and continue the lesson because _no one_ beats their father, certainly not _Mikey,_ (quietly fast as he is) and what are they supposed to do if their world is turned upside down like that?

**45\. Ruthless**

Swords and sai, even bos, are fit for long and graceful battles, but nunchucks wielders work best taking down their enemies quickly and brutally--Mikey is scared he's not capable of that, and equally scared that he is.

**46\. Grief**

Mikey ties the yellow mask around April's head, a fitting tribute to their fallen sister, and then goes to watch Donnie blow stuff up because right now he's in the mood to watch the city burn.

**47\. Pretty**

Sure, Mondo grew pot for a living and had decided a skateboard was a perfectly adequate weapon, but the first time he touched Mikey's face he didn't say he was fat or freaky or childish or anything that he'd heard a million times before, he told him that his freckles looked like stars.

**48\. Secret**

Mikey never told April about the long hours he spent with the Tessen, teaching himself to flip and twirl things without constantly clocking himself with the chucks, or that there was a notch in the tree where he'd once thrown into the trunk, too, or his sneaking suspicion that his father might have given the Tessen to him if he were a girl, or....well, there were a lot of things he'd never told April.

**49\. Visit**

"So, Mom," Mikey says as they sit on a hillside in the astral plane together, watching ducks in the brook, "I don't mean to make assumptions, but have you ever happened to bump into a man named Elvis?"

**50\. Late**

Mikey was the fastest one in his family, but he hadn't reached his father on time either night he'd fallen, and he hadn't caught Leo when he'd been tossed through the window, and he hadn't knocked Donnie out of April's grip or protected Raph from Rockwell and the Creep, so sometimes he thought his speed wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

**51\. Nicknames**

If Mikey gives funny names to the monsters trying to kill them, he's less likely to wake up in a cold sweat thinking about what might have gone wrong.


End file.
